Alcina

12:20 pm: ( How to piss off daily supply teachers )

05:39 pm: In which I look at Amazon's best selling opera DVDs
The results puzzle me!

1. Boheme
2. Boheme (another production)

Why is Boheme always the most popular of operas, especially among people who don't know much about opera? Can anyone explain it to me? It's fairly good...but it wouldn't come in my top 50 operas under any circumstances.

3. Butterfly

Oh Gods! Boheme is OK, Butterfly is just...tedious. *yawn* *squared* Why????? Why is this one of the world's most popular operas. Don't get me wrong, I ADORE most of Puccini...but I think that Boheme and Butterfly are the weakest of all (not counting Villi or Edgar, which were early crap)

4. The excrable recent ROH production of Fille du Regiment.

Great opera, shit production, with running, jumping and slapstick comedy ihn the foreground and music...lost in the background. DO NOT BUY THIS DVD!

5. Otello.
Well OK. I get this one; it's the best of Verdi's operas IMHO, and the Zeffirelli film is super.

5. Zauberflote
OK, so my least favourite of Puccini's adult operas are joined by my least favourite of Mozart's 7 adult-written operas.

6. Guilio Cesare
7. Don Giovanni

OK, now we're gatting onto better stuff, both of those would be in any top 20 I compiled....

8. Tristan.

Well, OK, that's reasonable...not my favourite but I can see its value...

9. Cosi

Nearly as tedious as the Flute...

10. Handsel and Gretel

Say what?

I can anly assume that my taste in opera is a long way from other peoples'...


(but seriously, no Tosca? No Figaro? If you want crowd-pleasers, where are they?)

09:51 pm: You know how you can identify the goths at the Year 11 prom?

They are the ones who are wearing 3 inch heels and not falling off them.

They are alos the ones in the toilets lacing up the back of everyone else's prom dress so that this time it won't fall off...

08:57 pm: Meme pinched from a total stranger called girlevolving
TEN HOWS
How did you get one of your scars?
Tore my leg on a projecting screw on a bench as I walked into assembly at the age of 14. Maybe I should have sued for lotsamoney?

How did you celebrate your last birthday?
I didn't

How are you feeling at this moment?
Tired.

How did your night go last night?
Drank half a bottle of vodka. Slept not enough. The usual.

How did you do in high school?
Very well. AAAB for A-level

How did you get the shirt you're wearing?
Froma cheap mail order catalogue.

How often do you see ur best friend?
Never. I've realised that the more I see people I knew back when I was happy and liked the life I lived, the more it hurts. I don't contact my friends, I don't look back and I don't so anything that might remind me that once my life was worth living. It's the only way I can survice.

How much money did you spend last month?
Acording to my bank statement, L1276

How old do you want to be when you get married?
I don't intend to marry again.

How old will you be at your next birthday?
40


NINE WHAT'S:

Your mothers name?
Mummy to me.

What did you do last weekend?
Drove my mother to Cambridge for a meeting, wandered about the streets trying to block out the homesick, failed. Came home drank a bottle of vodka. Felt ill the next day.

What is the most important part of your life?
Darkness

What would you rather be doing?
Having a life worth living?

What did you last cry over?
The death of a fictional character. As usual.

What always makes you feel better when you’re upset?
Vodka

What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other?
Tolerance

What are you worried about?
Nothing. Extreme despair has that little-acknowledged benefit. One of the lesser known compensations for misery.

What did you have for breakfast?
A cornish pasty. The local co-op had no bacon sandwichees AGAIN!


EIGHT HAVE YOU’S:

Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend?
Yes

Have you ever had your heart broken?
Yes

Have you ever been out of the country?
Yes. USA, Canada, France, Germany, Czech Republic, Holland, Vatican, Italy.

Have you ever done something outrageously dumb?
Hells, yes. Not sharing, though.

Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend?
A best friend at school who shared all my interests and obsessions, then one day met a guy and suddenly was Ms. Normal in all her opinions and interests and made it plain to me in front of th school that I was wierd, sad and abnormal for those things we'd shared.

Have you ever had sex on the beach?
I've never lived near a beach that wasn't all mud.

Have you ever dated someone younger than you?
Reader, I married him.

Have you ever read an entire book in one day?
Often. The last one was the school library's copy of Inkheart (a teen fantasy book)

SEVEN WHO’S:

Who was the last person you saw?
My mother. Who else...

Who was the last person you texted?
An automated system for testing messages about rare birds to twitchers, to switch off the messages I was receiving.

Who was the last person you hungout with?
I don't remember. Ajnd I don't want to remember. The only way to survive for me is shut out all memory of happoiuness and friendship entirely.

Who was the last person to call you?
The cover supervisor, springing an unexpected last-minute cover on me.

Who did you last hug?
My mother.

Who is the last person who texted you?
I refer my honourable friend to the answer I gave 4 messages ago. Except that they were sneding me info about rare birds.

Who was the last person you said "i love you" to?
Real person or fictional person? The last person was a character from the 'Inkworld'series of teen books. No, I'm not saying who. Though if you knw me I'm sure you can guess.

Assuming person means 'incarnate as a human' of course.


SIX WHERE’S:

Where does your best friend live?
Cambridge

Where did you last go?
School

Where did you last hang out?
I don't allow myself to remember any more.

Where do you go to school?
A school in South Yorkshire, UK. I dom't think it would be professional to name it.

Where is your favorite place to be?
Cambridge. But it's lost to me forever, so why think of it?

Where did you sleep last night?
Er...my bed?.


FIVE DO’S/DOES:

Do you like someone right now?
I like many, amny someones. But they are all either fictional characters or historical characters.

Do you think anyone likes you?
Of course not.

Do you ever wish you were someone else?
Someone else? Nope. Living a different life? Constantly. Preferably in a better universe than this.

Do you know the muffin man?
Not personally

Does the future scare you?
See the answer I gave some moments ago about the lesser-acknowledged benefits of despair. That would be a no, then.


FOUR WHY’S:

Why are you best friends with your best friend(s)?
They share things that I share with no-one else.

Why did you get a myspace/livejournal?
My Ex-husband gave me an invite code.


Why did your parents give you the name you have?
A fit of loyalty to the monarchy

Why are you doing this survey?
Because I've been away from lj too long


THREE IF’S:

If you could have one super power what would it be??
To pass into fictional universes... and, if possible to return here for another go in another if/when I die there


If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you?
No. I take responsibility for all my actions, like any Sith.

If you were stranded on a deserted island & could bring 1 thing what would you bring?
My replica Nazgul ring.


TWO WOULD-YOU-EVER’S:

Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you?
Yes. But not all of them.

Would you ever shave your head to save someone you love?
I would die for someone I love, or much worse, though the number of people who fits that description is extremely small. So, yes, obviously

ONE LAST QUESTION

Are you happy with your life right now?
No.

09:15 pm: Stress! Stress! Stress!

Excuse the lack of posting. I promise I will be back next month, OK?

02:50 pm: Am I the only one who thinks Karen Gillan looks almost exactly like Debbie Watling?

04:44 pm: Dear OFSTED
Your timing is atrocious. The last two days before Year 11 leave; the school will be so calm and peaceful...

04:40 pm: When the ones you taught at GCSE apply for a vacant teaching post, that's when you feel OLD...

09:55 pm: Last night I dreamed that, having borrowed a horse from someone on the last day of term before leaving University, I was unable to return it to her, and was extremely stressed. Also, I was having great difficulty tying a pregnant pig to a public litter bin.

I defy ANYONE to analyse my dreams...

05:52 pm: In which I stare in amazement at Amazon's suggestions
Amazon has suggestions for me. They concern opera.

Because I bought Boris Gudenov they suggest...Madama Butterfly
Because I bought Elisabetta, Regina d'Ingleterra (Rossini) they suggest...Parsifal
Because I bought Tamerlano (Handel) they suggest...From the House of the Dead(Janacek)

WTF???????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Connection not seen. You fail at recommending.

10:33 pm: I hope I die before I get old...
I have just spent 20 minutes writing out detailed instructions for my mother how to turn on the (new) TV using the remote control and how to play a videotape.

The only difference since the old one is that the buttons on the TV remote are in different places from what they were on the old one (but the same colour) (and the VHS machine is the same one and has not changed)

Nevertheless, I have had not only to write it out, but stick labels on the remotes. It turns out Teh Mother hasn't used TV or video while I've been at work since we got the new TV 6 months ago...

I find it difficult to understand how she didn't twig that the big red button turned on the TV. But I am even more confused by the fact that she can't work the SAME video recorder when we have a new TV...it's not like she's senile or anything, she can still hold really high-level conversation about almost any topic but...

What sort of thought process causes a person to think that a VCR works differently just because you have a new TV? Oh, Gods, I never want to be old.

10:04 am: Photos from recent birding trips which are pretty
Reliable dipper site:


Reliable black grouse site:


Potteric Carr YWT in pretty spring green:

10:34 pm: More amusing photos from my birding...


That's a rubbish road!!! I'm not going down there!!! I'm going to find another road!!! *storms off*

09:58 pm: In which I go birding
So, today I was tracking a scarce migrant (and scarce UK breeder, though not around here) on the East Coast. Here's where I was looking for it...guess the species anyone?

09:01 pm: In which I was very tired the last week of term
On Wednesday I arrived at school with my skirt on inside out
On Thursday I returned the paperwork for the Y11 exam entries to a (very puzzled) teacher who was not the one responsible for it.
And on Friday I left my lights on all day and completely drained my battery. A kind labtech jump-started me and managed to get me home, where my car sits in dry-dock while I wonder how to recharge the battery without much petrol in the tank (when I drove old banger, I never let it get below the 3/4 petrol in case I had to recharge the battery.) Yes, I own a charger, but the battery is corroded in solid and I lack the tools to remove it :(

09:42 pm: They came first for the fascists, I did not speak up because I was not a fascist....
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/merseyside/7956824.stm

Freedom of speech?
Freedom of belief?

What's that?

03:10 pm: In which I mark exercise books
Drinking too much alcohol can make you become a comma
Drinking too much alcohol can make you go into a korma
Arthritis is inflation near the joints
A drug that is often Miss used is alcohol *
If you stop taking an addictive drug, you get draw all symptoms
Drugs you take for fun are resurrection drugs
Alcohol causes brian and lover damage



(*Actually, I can't really quibble with that. Someone pass me the vodka...)

03:30 pm: In whihc I post (or probably repost) a set of failed attempts at translating
Re-organising my folders this afternoon, I came on the following quotes from a Far Eastern bootleg of The Two Towers, probably by the same people responile for the well known 'Backstroke of the West' mistranslations. They are actually just as good as those...

( Translation fail )

Eowyn reveals her true identity to the Witch-King:
Witch-King: You cannot harm me you foolish woman.
Eowyn: I am a man.

08:37 pm: In which I mention two things that puzzle me
First, the most surprising yet example of a large company lying to its consumers to sell more. I have long been convinced that in many cases 'sell by' and 'use by' dates are nothing to do with health concerns, or even legal covering their backs, but merely a scam to convince the less experienced among us to throw away perfectly good food and buy new stuff to replace it.

Tonight I seem to have proof. Tasco's website describes baking potatoes (i.e. large, old potatoes) as having a 'short shelf life' and specifically having to be eaten within 1-3 days.

Baking potatoes.
Old potatoes.
Within one to three days.

*boggle*

Secondly, when the alarm clock woke me this morning, I was in the process of saying in my dream 'How wonderful. I have discovered that I am becoming an elf.'

W.
T.
F???????

06:32 pm: Balrogs' wings
This is a very convincing essay arguing against Balrogs having wings.

http://www.glyphweb.com/arda/b/balrogs.html

In particular, the arguments on the issue of scale (if the Balrog had real wings then on the textual evidence we are faced with a reasonably small balrog with wings the size of a jet aircraft) is pretty compelling.

07:35 am: In which I have a most peculiar dream
I appeared to have discovered a secret Jedi enclave in the middle of the everyday world, where people whose lives were not completely centred on materialist things would go. There were large chambers in the four corners, with glass walls looking out at vegetation,linked by 4 corridors. I went and explored the corridors; oddly enough rebelfilms was with me. I can now remember only three of these corridors, but they were most odd.

The first had dozens of glittering crystal 'doors' across them; as you walked down the corridor the air moved by your passing was funnelled by an apparatus whose Physics seems very unlikely to work, to open the doors, and also to operate some ethereal sounding crystal wind chimes. The panels were faceted so they glittered as they opened; all very beautiful. The second corridor was made of crystal panels beyound which some beautiful trees/bushes, a little like willows, with pale yellow-green leaves grew in a row; all very cool and peaceful. The third corridor, also glass, contained hundreds of ordinary everyday people, sitting on the ground meditating...and holding large carrots. Apparently they were trying to understand fully such an everyday item, because only by understanding everyday things can you understand the Force. At least that was what the bloke in Jedi robes in charge of the carrots told me. I can't help thinking that Prof Freud would have been interested by the fact that he chose carrots.

The odd thing about this enclave was that it was joined on to a large 'temple of pure consumerism' which turned out to be a big out-of-town shopping mall, the kind where you can't buy anything useful like food, only hundreds of different types of clothes and television sets. However, if you knew where the hidden entrance was, you could leave this and find the Jedi temple.

The the dream shifted and rebelfilms and I were in an inn, where we were, oddly enoiugh accompanied by Frodo and Pippin. The landlord sold us McDonald's hamburgers. Then I overheard him plotting to drug our large fries and steal the One Ring, but was able to warn our party, and we escaped. (why? If I really found myself accompanying Frodo on his quest I would be the first one attacking him and taking the Ring...straight back to its rightful owner)

Even in the dream I do remember being surprised and rather disconcerted by the fact that I was wearing Jedi robes...

10:01 pm: In which I listen to a demo I made with a band some years ago
I wanted to be Abaddon soooo badly, didn't I, especially the partial doubling of the guitar line? Or maybe that's just what you get when you have a drummer who has never been taught to drum ;)

Still, there are far worse things to be like, and I'm actually rather proud, looking back, of my non-conformity to what drums are supposed to do. And worse bands to copy than early Venom. At least it's different.

04:51 pm: In which a writer for SFX magazine totlally fails to impress his audience with his Tolkien geekery
From the recent SFX Special about films they've give 5-stars to, an article comparing the films of LotR with the books. The author is clearly trying to impress us with his in-depth obscure knowledge...'I've read all the background stuff and know things you don't'.

Here's what he managed to produce:

But technically [Legolas] should have dark hair- Legolas isn't one of the Noldorim like Galadriel or Celeborn, those elves who saw the light of the trees in the undying lands...

Managing to get 5 factual mistakes in his geekery in just over 30 words is really quite impressively poor showing of his 'extensive knowledge'.

PS. I will not think about the fact that I picked up all 5 mistakes instantly, or ask what that says bout how sad a geek I am...

10:14 pm: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is absolutely unbelievable in the 21st century if it is correctly reported: an alleged rape victim held in the cells (presumably for contempt of court) for trying to run out of the witness box in an emotional state while testifying...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/tayside_and_central/7906389.stm?lss

*boggle*

09:08 am: Dear Head of a School in Barnsley,

I'm going to buy you some of those flash cards they use in pramary schools for teaching the names of weather conditions. Please study them carefully, especially the one that shows you how to recognise SNOW. That way, next time you may, perhaps, notice it BEFORE 8am, and thus your staff will not have to drive through a blizzard, skidding all over the road, and your caretakers will not have to stand outside the school for 2 hours turning people away.

P.S. I'm sorry I scratched the car-park gatepost by skidding into it; I consider it a miracle I didn't have a worse accident, actually.

Yours,
Alcina2

PS. And thanks for not telling the Supply Agency, leaving it for me to sort out...

03:23 pm: Today I ammostly marking exercise books :(
'We put the amylase and starch mixture into some Viking tubing'

'Butterflies carry a drinking straw which they stick in flowers'

08:31 pm: [slytherin mode] What the world really needs now is a President of the USA who can't tell the difference between white-tie and black-tie and turns up to a ten balls wearing...wait for it...

A dress shirt, a white tie, and a black-tie dinner suit that is so far from fitting that I can't help wondering if it came from a charity shop. Presidents can't afford bespoke tailoring? [/slytherin mode]

Oh, and was I the only one reminded of Harry Potter at the Yule Ball, really, really not knowing how to do ballroom dancing in front of a lot of people?

(nice dress the First Lady had though. WANT)

09:03 pm: I'm remembering right now ll my freinds at Uni who laughed at me when I said I was going to be a teacher and told me how much better it was to be an accountant, set up a business, go into industry...

*looks at the newspaper*

Who's got the last laugh now? *grin*

11:27 am: Dear Obsessive Xtians: You is making yourselves look silly. Thank you for your attention

Min you, I can't help thinking the atheists who started it all are making themselves look a bit shallow. And I can't help wondering why they assume everyone believes in a single Deity.

05:25 pm: Confuzzled by the purchsing tastes of opera fans
According to Amazon customers who bought a DVD of Paisiello's Barbiere di Siviglia most often bought it with...

Peter Grimes.

? wtf?

eta: I am astonished to see that 4 operas by Paisiello are currently available on DVD. *boggle* It seems the 'forgotten' 25 year gap in performed Italian operas between 1790 and 1815 is being closed at last.